I was wrong - terribly wrong

My previous blog “We were wrong - terribly wrong” describes the call to forgive the biggest evils and atrocities in our lives. With Jesus as our role model and through the power of the Holy Spirit forgiveness is certainly possible and even required as Christians. However, an additional thought crept into my brain recently that reminded me of why forgiveness is so important…I am a HUGE sinner.

It’s easy to criticize others, to find errors and weaknesses in their reasoning or actions. It’s easy to hold grudges on the especially big hurts – where little to no explanation suffices. But, don’t we all make major mistakes? I truly attempt to hate all sin in my life, but that doesn’t keep my sinful, human nature from taking over on a daily basis.

Seen “My Name is Earl” TV show on NBC? Earl has made list of all the big mistakes he’s made and now tries to “right” these wrongs. When I think of my own life, I can easily create a list of such major offenses, sins that I have committed. Yes, on numerous occasions in my life, everyday, I've been wrong, often even terribly wrong.

There are things on the list for which I asked God for forgiveness, some for which I haven’t forgiven myself, and probably many for which I haven’t been forgiven by those I hurt. And, yet, for all the sins I put on the list and all those I fail to see, I am still forgiven. God continues to forgive me in my pride, selfishness, pity and so much more. He didn’t even wait until I said, “sorry”. He died on the cross anyway.

Can I always be mad at the airport for tearing down my community, at the government for Vietnam, etc.? Sure, but there’s an arrogance in that anger – they can’t make mistakes but I can, or their mistakes are somehow far worse than mine. How can I judge the weight of how sin affects different people in different ways? To be more like God isn’t to have an inflated sense of “I know when others are SO wrong”. To be more like God is to forgive. God only loves and we hurt him in return – how can he forgive so easily? And, then, as someone who does hurt others, how can I hold myself to a higher standard than God – withholding my forgiveness because I’m “so right” and they are “so wrong”? I don’t know about you, but the next time I’m quick to anger or create a grudge, I need to remember my “Earl” list, the fact that I am loved and forgiven by someone who knows the list well and that we’re all in the same boat.

After all, St. Paul says, “forgive, as the Lord has forgiven you.”